Welcome fluff!!!
"fluff" is back!!! Althou it doesn´t taste as good as I remember it, I now have it... well, here...!
Other than that I´m going crazy trying to come up with something scary to dress up in on the party on saturday,
What is scary!?
I thought maybe me in a bikini but apparently I should go for the bathingsuite if anything, acording to P and H.
Should go to sleep now... Loads of food to be cooked tomorrow...
Today;
Other than that I feel like I´m falling apart. I don´t know why, I don´t really have a reason.
I just feel like... Like my body and mind are pulling me in a million different directions and I just fall to pieces...
All I want to do is cry really... Cry and start over. What?
I don´t know...
Glue anyone?
Nostalgia...
Yesterday I helped pa and M to move all the furniture upstairs since the handymen are gonna fix it up and what did I find?
Loads of tapes from 1987-92! Movies that is! Of me, my family and our friends!
So today I had a nostalgia day and watched them all! Fab!
This is what I found;
I had my first planned performance at the age of two.
If I would have lived in the U.S. would sue my mom for all the fashion disasters she put me through!
My dad looked like a moviestar even when he played with me in the snow! (Moustache, leather jacket and sun glasses!)
"Who am I?" was broadcast teh o´clock on new years eve 1990 in Holland.
Our house was really ugly when we bought it. Wild bet!
We were all soo small! (Andreas, Annika, Ida, Malin, Paola, Caroline, Daniel, Malin amongst others...)
Dads english is really really bad... Or was... I don´t know... But when you refer to a dot as a prick, well, then it´s bad.
"Luciatåg" is one of my favourite traditions.
My first school class was fantastic! I still love all of you in a special way.
And I love two of the teachers that really in ways made me what I am today... Ingrid and Ragnhild.
Ballet is still one of my favourite style of dance.
I really really miss my grandfather Lasse and my grandmother Britt-Marie. They where taken away too soon and I just which I could have another moment in their presence...
I love you.
Ida goes poetry;
And how can you not lie, when there´s no reasons at all but love?
"Don´t say that cause it doesn´t change the ending" she´s thinking,
but says; "Yes, things change. Now I´m too good looking for you."
"You´re wrong, nothing changed..." he sighs.
She turns and walks away, not to let him see her tears.
He´s on tv,
part of the past.
Reminds me of all the good days.
He´s singing a song I didn´t know then,
but somehow I know you´d love it.
He´s smiling and talking about
friends we both know
and I know his girlfriend.
He brings back the smells,
through that screen
and memories he didn´t make.
I wonder if you´ve seen it
and feel the same
and if you still own that orange t-shirt.
Time has been long
and still it has not,
it moved fast and slow
and mixed it all up.
Do you stay the night with her?
I´m here with people who love me.
They don´t even know you or him,
but know that I´m running away.
I could call him,
but it´s a bit late.
You and I´ll never call.
What did we know about fate?
I don´t want a fairytale and ends with no ends.
I rather not have anything than the cheap words that romance lends.
If I am to be asked, you are what I´ll plead.
But nothing more than you, I´m tired of make belives.
The reason I´m not crying anymore is not that I´m over him,
but that I don´t feel that much for anything anymore.
If you listen, you´ll here that my laugh is not as loud either.
Damn him.
Love;
And we all sing;
And I liked it
The taste of her cherry chapstick
I kissed a girl
Just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don't mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Don't mean I'm in love tonight
I kissed a girl
And I liked it
On my way?
Been tryin to get in contact with D aswell but I just can´t!
The number is out of use, I´ve forgotten what the town he´s moved to is called and he´s got like one of Swedens most common names. I´ve tried his e-mail but still haven´t got an answer and I´m starting to get a bit worried...
Not that I should. He´s probably busy with his little baby girl and all, but still, it´s not like him and I hope everything is ok.
D, if you see this, give me a call! I miss you...
Other than that I´m havin the most horrible fashion/beauty-day. Nothing I put on looks good and I just feel crap.
Maybe I´m catching a cold or something...
Well, I´m not gonna get stuck here today. Out and about... Ohh, I miss you N!
Not long til the fifth now thou! And then; London!
Kinks fixed!
Yes, with some more help from darling brother, I think I´m finally happy with my blogg... for now!
Make him some soup and he´ll do anything for you! ;)
And before you even ask; Yes, he´s taken!
Now I´m gonna try to force him to laugh...
And we all sing;
Until you've walked a mile in his shoes
So I stole your shoes
And I walked a mile in them
And I still won't consider you a friend
The shoes were a pair of Nikes
I do admit I liked these
White and navy blue
You're a dick in pretty shoes
I must say you're a dick in pretty shoes
And I thought about the kid who made them
Working his ass off for a loaf of bread
And for all I know that kid just might be dead
The deep one is not for me...
A friend told me; "Once you go geek, you can´t go back."
And that´s probably true...
So, will I never have a guy who writes me poems or one who knows how to fix broken pipes?
Kind of sad...
But still!
The geek is veeery lovable!
And if he´s passionat about one thing, well, then he can probably be passionat about... other things. ..
I think I´m a proud geek-lover! Bring on the geeks!
I´m watching Virgin Territory right now.
It´s hilarius! And I can really recommend it!
"Young Florentines regale one another in the Italian countryside while the black plague decimates their city."
Bravo Ida!
I think I acctually allmost understand how to do this header things and other blogg stuff and shit...
Not perfectly, but at least it´s better than it was! ;)
I´m back at ma´s now and was meant too be seeing Pernilla today but unfortunally she´s sick and now here I am.
Tragic?
Maybe... But it´s my vacation and I can do what I like!
So next on the agenda is; Världens härligaste män!
Love it and love Ann Söderlund. She´s brilliant!
So let´s make some popcorn and curl up in the sofa!
I wish I knew how to do it...
I always have to ask my little brother for advice and help, and even after that I don´t really get it...
I´ve been working on a nice header for at least half an hour now and I´m bored, annoyed and really pissed off now.
It doesn´t work the way I want it too!!!
If I could just scrap it down on a paper and that would seal the deal, well, it would have been easy.
But that doesn´t work and now I have to do with this...
If someone feels like doing a good deed, well, my header needs your help!
Other then that I´m to high up in my own head right now to acctually get down what I think and feel.
I cried today for the first time in a long long time and it felt soo good.
You know things don´t always turn out the way you thought they would, but any how you wake up the next day and live and laugh and well, get on...
Honestly; don´t listen to me right now! I don´t think I make much sense. But if you have any questions; don´t hesitate to ask and I´ll try to answer them!
Now I´m gonna make that phone call that I´ve been trying to make all night...
What´s the difference?
Yeah, what is really the difference between a date and a coffee?
I always seem to mix them up or missunderstand or... well, I feel like I always end up on the wrong end of the line...
I guess a date is having a coffee with someone who you´d like to have something more than a coffee with, but to be honest; it isn´t easy to know the difference!
I´ve never asked anyone on a date, but I´ve asked quite a lot of people out for coffee...
Is it that I´m blind and very blue eyed or do I sound flirtish when I ask?
Cause quite a lot of the guys I´ve had coffee with have thought it was a date... I´ve heard afterward!
It´s not that I don´t like dates! I´d acctually love to go on one! If I knew that that was what it was... Not having to guess or realise it after it´s all over.
Apperently I´ve just said yes to a date! The reason I know is cause one of my friends told me that the guy had told him that we were going on a date... Is that straight forward or what!?
So, why am I not jumping to the clouds and kissing my phone right now?
Well, it´s not because I don´t fancy him... He´s acctually really sweet and good looking as well!
It´s more because I don´t know if I´m avalible for dating yet...
I guess I am after the call today.. But I still really do like him... It´s all too complicated...
Give me my own Andreas Halldén!
Me like very much!
I know I´ve always said that if I ever get married it would be to Peter Jöback.
But I´ve kind of had to rethink... Honestly, sex is too important to me!
And having this kind of long distant thing has made me think even more... what am I really looking for?
Well, this is what I´ve come up with;
* Smart (He has to be able to understand my jokes and thinking)
* Funny (I like when guys laugh... a lot!)
* Attractive (I have to fancy the outside to fall in love with the inside)
* Easy going (Kind of ready for anything)
* Adventures (Always on the go)
* Sensitive (I cry - he should too!)
* Handy (I like when they want to fix things for me)
* Good in bed (Pleasure, pleasure...)
* Crazy (In a good way. I am)
* Passionat (If you like things, like them well)
Yes, that and probably ten thousand other things...
Althou I´m not that picky... or... well... I guess I am...
I think it´s time to stop this now... We´ll see what happends later, but now, I think it´s wrong...
Well, that felt good to say!
Gaaah!
But anyway! I´m sooooo mad!
I just want to scream and hit and gaaah!
Why why why!?!
I´m just so tired of weird and... annoying people!
Give me, please, happy and normal ones for a change!
Okay, I´m over exaggerating...
But for ones, could not things just be easy!?
It´s not like I like hurting peoples feelings or making them mad, but why do they care so damn much!?!
I need a long walk and that´s just what I´m gonna treat myself too now... And take away coffee!
And we all sing;
You've got such pretty eyes
Let's jump of sky-high buildings
Let's believe that we can fly
Let's do it cause we wan't to
Let's do it cause we can
Let's laugh our very heads off
Let's do it once again
Let's get naked under blankets
Let's get wasted, let's get stoned
Let me tell you I adore you
Oh let me take you home
Let's not talk about the sorrows
Let's just say that, oh oh oh
Let's go crazy for each other
And let's just fall in love...
Beautiful!
I understand if you might not be as fascinated as I am, but I still have to say:
Sweden is so unbelievably beautiful!
I fall in love everytime I come home! With life!
Yesterday I visited an old friend and we just hung out all night, talking and talking about everything between earth and sky, wich got me thinking...
Most mornings I wake up and think to myself; God, I´m boring and my life is sooo jaded!
But with some contemplating and insight into myself I have to admit that my life is probably as far away from Svensson Svensson as you can get without changing your extraction...
To start off with I love everyday glamour... No, I´m addicted to it! I don´t work with routines and monotony and therefore I prioritize small things and bring luxury into my life. And I´m so used to it now that I hardly even see it... It´s everyday stuff...
And as well, I panic at the thought of getting stuck somewhere without really wanting too.
I often hear; I´m soo jealous of you!
But why!? Really!?
What I´ve done with my life anyone can do!!
You don´t have to tie yourself up to things, or settle for less than you want!
So why does people give up!?
I don´t understand...
But! I guess it´s not my problem...
I just wish that they wouldn´t be jealous of things they can have themself...
Anyway I also went to see my princesses yesterday. They get more and more beautiful everytime I see them!
This is Lillsnuffsan, My!
Tea time again...
Ohh I had such a fab day! My sweet princesses AND my darling brother!
Now, I´m back to tea and party planning... Not going far in that direction.
Party planner is soo not in my top five of jobs I have to have before I die....
And if just the task wasn´t boring enough I kind of got stuck on reading blogs...
My friends is acctually really funny, who would have known!? ;)
Well, I´m gonna focus now... I think...
And we all sing;
'Cause you asked for it,
'Cause you need one, you see.
I'm not gonna write you a love song,
'Cause you tell me it's,
Make or breaking this.
If you're on your way,
I'm not gonna write you to stay.
If all you have is leaving,
I'm gonna need a better reason to write you a love song today.
Today.
Back on track...
Well... A whole lot happned.
I had brilliant times, bad times and times that just didn´t matter.
But all in all; it changed.
Basic; I´ve finished my third season in the baleares and I´m back home.
Home for a couple of weeks and then of too London.
Where love awaits?
Well, I´ve had my day of hiding and watching too much tv.
Now I´m gonna start to find my wonderful friends again.
Outside it´s raining and it´s a wonderful swedish autum day. I love!
Think I´ll have to have that hard chat with the wonderful person in UK as well..
I think we should see what happends when I get there cause it´s been so long now and I just feel confused.
You shouldn´t be confused with a guy as lovely as him, so something is definatily wrong...
Well well, now I´m gonna call sweet Pernilla and see exactly how good it is to be pregnant... :)
Congrats my friend! You´ll be the best mom ever!
And as well... plan the party... Loads to do and I haven´t even finished my tea!
Venga venga!
